God Has Us In The Palm Of His Hands

Since my surgery I have not been driving, can't raise my arms over my head or lift over five pounds for six weeks. Mom and I have reversed roles and she comes over and hangs out and taxi's me around. We have been taking walks each day - a relaxed pace. Yesterday we were so tired when we got back. Mom noticed three hammocks in our complex and as soon as she got to the first one - she fell in and wasn't getting up. So I landed in the next one. It felt so good and I have a hard time getting comfortable. I laid there and thought about how good this felt and how I could feel the warm sun on my body.

That night I woke up and could not go back to sleep. Finally, I thought of that hammock and how good it felt. I thought about that warm sun on my face. I pictured God holding me in the palm of His hand. At some point I dozed off. I don't know why I don't picture this every night. I know He is there. Lately, I find myself thinking about the "what if's" of my pathology report, at night. I try to remind myself that none of us are promised tomorrow and yet we don't lie awake at night worrying that we might get hit by a car the next day. So what can I do? I tell God I don't know the future but I know He will always be with me. Hebrews 13: 5, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” He will always bring good from the bad for me. Romans 8: 28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

I like how Oswald Chambers put it, we are like “a bow and arrow in the hands of an archer. God is aiming at something the saint cannot see, and He stretches and strains, and every now and again the saint says — ‘I cannot stand anymore.’ God does not heed, He goes on stretching till His purpose is in sight, then He lets fly.” We are being refined! Not sure what direction I am going but it will fit the purpose God has chosen for me. And I will not go alone for He will be with me.